Wednesday, August 3, 2011

The 5 Worst Films of 2011 (So Far)


Everyone else seems to be doing it - even that damn wiener-kid on "Ebert at the Movies" - so why not me? Well, I actually don't see all that many bad movies, to be honest, as I can't spend money to see just anything. However, that does not mean that I haven't seen a few bad ones this year, especially with the year's early releases finally making their way to DVD.

5. Limitless

I caught this one on-demand and I can say that it wasn't really worth it. For some reason, the film received a lot of praise when it was released earlier this year, which resulted in me wanting to check it out. Not a whole lot happens in the movie, which is also full of peculiar stylistic choices that come off more amateur than unique. Cooper is decent as the main character, but he doesn't really exude the charisma that he does in his comedic roles. Ultimately, Limitless is low on thrills and exciting plot lines, but high on lazy montages and exposition.

4. Cairo 678

An overlong and poorly-acted Egyptian melodrama, which doesn't seem to follow logic or contain realistic characters. 678 has high-minded goals of challenging issues of sexual-harassment, but fails to do so, only making its female leads appear irrational.

3. Battle: Los Angeles

An incoherent rabble of military/war movie cliches and hard-to-follow battle scenes. The characters also lack any development that would make you want to cheer for them. Battle: LA is a heartless, unimaginative, dull feature that should have never seen the light of day.

2. Dragonslayer

This is a documentary that mysteriously received acclaim at festivals earlier this year despite being almost unwatchable. The subject, a hardly-passable former ex-skateboarder, has no redeemable qualities and he obviously revels in the undeserved attention him and his loser friends receive. Dragonslayer is a waste of time for anyone who comes within three feet of it.  

1. Red Riding Hood

What an embarrassment of modern filmmaking. Catherine Hardwicke proves what a worthless hack she is with this ugly, lame teen vehicle set in a fairy-tale village plagued by a murderous werewolf. Poor dialogue, poor plotting and even poorer visual effects take Red Riding Hood out of the realm of ironic-funny and into the sadly deepening pool of just plain bad.

AND, like I said, I haven't seen a lot of films that might have made this list. Here's a few potentially-bad films that I hope to catch before the year is out:

- Suckerpunch
- Straw Dogs
- Pirates 4
- Green Lantern
- Transformers 3 

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